A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

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Who's fat? Holly Davis.

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I like to sniff your hair when you are asleep.

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What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

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What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

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Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

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The economy.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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What's the number one killer in America? Death.

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

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A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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