What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

How Long is a Chinese name.

Joshua Brown was in a dark forest, with a misty haze surrounding him. He turned quickly and flicked his hair out of his face. Dylan Hodge appeared and they had wild sex all night!

what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

How do you evolve a Pikachu into a Raichu? You use a Thunderstone.

Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

You might be redneck if you are... Indian

Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...