What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

Arrow to the Knee

Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

clamidia

What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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Knock Knock! Come in.

Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

if a black man, a Chinese man, and an Indian were about to jump off the Eiffel tower, who would hit the ground first? who cares?

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

Jesus wept.

A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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