What's a vampire's favorite subject in school? Probably math.

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What's yellow and dangerous? China.

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so a baby seal walks into a club...

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give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

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What color is a banana? yellow.

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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knock knock. I have a doorbell, you don't have to knock.

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You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

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what do you do if there is a black person in your front yard? tell him to leave...

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How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

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What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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