Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

Why did the white man accuse the black man of stealing his wallet? Because they were the only two men in the room at the time of the theft

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

Wumbo

3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

pedophile

Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

A girl walks into a bar she is then drugged, raped and left in a back alley. To this day she still has psychological issues that are directly related to this event

HaHaHaHa... Was the last joke funny? Ya, well this ones not.

how do you get expelled? Rape a special ed kid.

Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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