why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

Donald trump walks into the whitehouse. He's there for a business meeting with the new president.

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

What do dogs and keyboards have in common? Nothing.

Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board.

If I tell you that seeing you happy, is my main motivation towards accepting right now, would you believe me?

What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

Why did the chicken cross the road? How am I supposed to know?

What do you call a donkey on Christmas? a donkey.

Today's Horoscope for Cancer: You have Cancer.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse responds "I have cancer"

What did the black man say to his wife on valentines day? - You are fat

And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police The police who? Sir, your wife is dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

What did the rabbit buy the Jewish duck for Hanukkah? Nothing, animals don't celebrate holidays.

dyslexics of the world untie!

Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

i love to lick...

What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

Meh, I dont want it anymore! You take it!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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