What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

Why do Vampires drink your blood? Because the movie maker needed a story

There are two muffins in an oven neither can say anything at the moment, however, because both are in excruciating pain.

How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

Ask me if I'mm a candy cane. Shutup, there are a lot of these types of jokes. Create your own you poophead.

Where does the Queen of England live? England.

When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

How do you confuse a blonde? Very carefully.

Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

What does the fox say? Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding!

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a structure used to support sitting people, the other is a human being native to Mexico.

Why did the baby stop crying? I shot it with a 9mm pistol and put it in the microwave because it cried while I was watching Sienfeld.

sorry son your nanas been put down

What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

Hey I Just Met You , And This is Crazy But Don't Text. My Phone Cuz You Stalk Me Daily #Taste_MyCarmel

how do you get a scouters power level to 9,000? power levels dont exist in real life therefore cannot reach 9,000

what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

I killed someone on minecraft.

Jamie stegman liked doodle alot. Yummy he thought to himself as it entered his mouth.

What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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