Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

Q: What happened when lost John lost his crack cocaine? A: He bought some weed.

Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

Roses are red Violets are blue Flesh is green When the dead start to rise you're on my team

what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

How do you stop a bus? throw a boy with an ice cream cone infront of the bus. but...come to think of it, that may not work. he might drop the ice cream on top of it >:l

My friend was driving me home from a party, and was quite drunk. I was relieved that we did not get into a car crash.

Roses are red, Violets are blue.. And IDGAF!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

MR MC CANN WHATS THE ANSWER

What did the father give to his daughter? AIDS.

A man walks into a haunted house and screams. He had arrows on a nail.

Yo mom is so stinky that when she gets in a room every one leaves the room

whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket.

What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? Wanted by the police.

What happens when Chuck Norris and Mr. T get into a car accident? They trade insurance information.

What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock knock. I've got a gun. Knock kn [*BANG!*] [L]

have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

A woman walked out of the kitchen.

Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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