What did steve do when jane asked him for a pencil? He gave her one.

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Why did the boy cross the street He didnt he got hit by a plane instead

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Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

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knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

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Jesse's mom is so god damn fat that it is an extreme danger just being around her

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Antijokes...

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*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse responds "I have cancer"

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what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A baseball, bat, and a glove.

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yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

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What is a quicker way to transfer money than electronic banking? Keeping it on one's person and getting mugged for it, or else handing it over in a mutual deal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his farmer was abusive.

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Why did Piglet look in the toilet? He was probably fascinated by the flush.

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What did the man do with his cat? he threw it in the garbage because he didn't like it

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Do you know what's annoying? Steve

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Christianity

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Laughter and joy... You are really sweet you know.. Excuuuse me princess! But Like Mickey Mouse never changed... From a Potato peeler to some fuckup private detective in a trenchcoat. So tell me, what character did Walt Disney draw before Mickey Mouse?

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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What's 9+10? 19.

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Q: What say one therapist to a friend? A: I'm the rapist

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And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

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What is the difference between a Mexican man and a bench? The Mexican man is a human being, thus being sentient and able to partake in social activities, such as receiving education, meeting people, getting a job, raising a family, and getting somewhere in life. The bench cannot do anything. It is inanimate and is meant to be sat on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops