Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Roses are red...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is blue? The sky! Hahaha best joke to laught at with all of your buds hehehehehee

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the butler say to the guest while his master is in the bathroom? Butler: "Sir, will you wait while the Master bathes?" Guest: "How long will he be, I'm quite busy!" Butler: "He shouldn't be long sir, he should be finishing up now."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What does the kitty say to his owner? you've CAT to KITTEN right MEOW

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man is working at a bar. He feels a fly graze his left index finger, which has become a bit sweaty. The man rubs the finger for a moment, then continues to slice grapes for a customers synthetic japanese glue farm.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A lysdexic man tries to spell rentally metarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's worse then 10 babies nailed to 10 trees? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What has hands but isn't alive? A dead person.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A Mexican, German, and a black man walk into a bar... They promptly exit due to the access amount of tobacco fumes in the air.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

thumb_up thumb_down -20

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the white male say to the black male who had just robbed a bank? I'm glad you have a reliable source of income to feed yourself and your family

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the paper say to the pen? Nothing, they are inanimate objects!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops