Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

What did the tree say to himself? Gee-oma-tree( get it geometry say it outloud)

If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

Q:What do you call a black man on the moon? A:A problem. Q:What do you call 100 black men on the moon? A:A problem. Q:What do you call the entire race of black people on the moon? A:A problem solved

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

Womens rights

Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

hi

Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

Your momma's so fat...

when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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