Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Brian. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

live or die you decide to late time to die

A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

Kony 2012

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

Whats worse than the Halocaust? Your mom

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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