I was going to write a joke about Alzheimers ... but I completely forgot it.

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Your Mother

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a termite walks into a bar and asks, "wheres the bar tender?"

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What happens when Terran Hansen has sex with a cow? Jesse Z.

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Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

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Friends are a lot like trees. If you hit them multiple times with an axe, they will fall down.

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what do u do if a women serves you lunch in the living room? u tighten the chain!!!!!!

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What did Sir Mix a lot say to the girl with a big butt? Your very beautiful.

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roy g biv

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A girl talks to here boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by jimmy savile.

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why do muslims always turn to their left? Because they don't have their rights.

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

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Yo mama's fat.

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How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Everyone runs out, screaming, "AH, a dead guy is walking!"

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How do you make a black guy cry? You kill his family.

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What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your pork? Finding half of a worm, because the worm you just ate is going to live in your stomach, breed, then come out your butt. Or the Apocalypse.

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How did the black kid pass his exam? He studied.

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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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