A Lion walked into bar. He ordered a steak Because lions love meat.

knock,knock whos there? teddybear. teddybear who? a teddybear killed your family.

Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

T u r n i p s

In an apartment complex, a black family lived on the first floor, a mexican family lived on the second floor, and a white family lived on the third floor. Suddenly, at about noon on tuseday, a giant tornado came through town and took out the entire complex, destroying everything. Why did only the white familey survive the catastophy? Because both parents were at work and the kids were in school.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Cuz she had no arms! B I T C H

Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

What did the customer say to the waitier? "I think I'll have the special."

What do you get if you throw a banana at the wall? Nothing.

What's wrong with a muslim flying a plane? Nothing you racist

Tommy got neutered.

roses are red violets are blue your mum is a whore as are you:)

Heeeheeeerrrrrrrrrrr

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a nest of worms in your apple.

What do you call a man who kills others for his own amusement? A psychologist

Hi! This is Ms.McGruder you two boys in my office at 3:00 p.m. today

Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

What's funnier than diarrhoea? Cancer What's funnier than cancer? The holocaust

How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

how do you kill a giraffe? shoot it

What do you get when Johnson cooks toast? Shit toast.

why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

Ron Paul for President!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...