What did the duck say when it saw a puddle? Nothing.Ducks are uncapable of speaking human speech.

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Q) A black man and a white man are playing a basketball game, who will win? A) The one who scores the most points.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A: A quadriplegic.

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While your reading this. A man is robbing your home and sodomizing your dog

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How many polish people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. The polish are a civilized and prosperous country.

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Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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A seal walks into a club.

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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Why did the Liberal tell the truth? If one ever does we will have the answer.

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What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

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When geese fly in the "V" shape, why is one side longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the government, your home is being repossessed.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

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What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

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Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

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69

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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what do you call ten white people on a bench ten white people sitting on a bench, possibly eating their lunch

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do you know whats worse than a bad joke on antijoke.com the holocaust.

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A man gets pushed in to a pole...

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Want to hear the funniest joke in the world? I forget how it goes but it ends with the abolishment of slavery.

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How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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