Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

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Brandon Bass's career average for assists is 0.7 a game. guess what his nickname is bassy

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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Why did Phil Krahn cross the road? Because he is gay

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Man goes into a bar and orders 7 shots, the bartender says "Long day, huh?", the Man says yeh then goes home and kills himself.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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It's not that hard to be Dyslexic. You just have to accept it nad ovem no.

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Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

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Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

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Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

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Boys have swag, real men have class

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Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

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What did the boy reading the book do? He kept turning pages and reading until he came to the end, closed the book, and put it back onto the book shelf.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into your grandmother and finding a fish

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If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

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What did the biscuit say when he saw his friend get run over? Oh my god. Dave, are you ok? Somebody call an ambulance.

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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How do you get 100 midgets into a mini? You have to manufacture a mini big enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It won't be street legal, but at least your problem with fitting the midgets in the mini is solved.

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Why did the boy get nothing from Santa? He's Jewish.

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Bob Saget

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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