A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

"knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The SS, we heard you are smuggling jews in your attic, so you are coming with us."

What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know but you're a sick person even thinking about it.

Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

Q:Why did Hitler lose World War II? A:His "gas" bill.

How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

What's the difference between difference and between? One is different and the other between.

A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

9/11.

Q:What is usually pink, brown or black, usually big and comes out smaller, which goes in and out of your mothers mouth? A: Could be lots of things really... Moral: But we all know what you imagined you sick bastard!

Why do so many Koreans go to medical school? Practicing medicine is a rewarding and respected career.

Jimmy clenches his fist, a crack his heard. Jimmy begins to cry knowing his arthritis has gotten worse.

Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

A man walked into a bar. He got drunk. What did u think he'd do, have coke-a-cola? Dumbass.

Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

Wanna know what is gross? a dead baby in a dumpster. Grosser? Ten dead babies in a dumpster. Grosser? There is a live one at the bottom. Grosser? It ate its way out. Grosser? It came back for seconds.

kieran scott peels his off his foreskin while he watches hentai porn then he eats it afterwards, he is also on roids

25.

Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

How many immature teenagers does it take to change a light bulb? Ya mum.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon... Michael Jackson has sex with little boys.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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