Hum... I am actually a redhead... Which is so strange saying to anyone including myself, I dye it like constantly.

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my dick is like a bridge. i dont know why.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Dave." "Dave who?" Dave holds back tears as he realises his mother's Alzheimer's is getting worse.

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teacher: what do you call a math book with no writing in it?! student: idk what? teacher: a notebook! student: ok... thanks

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm dying of AIDS so I guess I'm feeling a little sorry for myself"

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did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

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Q: What do you call a dog with metal balls and two-inch legs? A: Animatronic

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Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

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What happens when u poke a ghost that is standing on the edge of a building? Ghost aren't real so therefor u will fall of the edge and die

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How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

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Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

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Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

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How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

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You wanna hear a joke? People that debase womens' rights.

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Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: In order to avoid being mauled by a coyote.

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Once upon a time there was a tree. But it was just a tree, so it sat there. Then it didn't rain for a while, so the tree died. And nothing ever grew there again. The End

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What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops