knock knock whos there? police police who? police your house is on fire and your kid just died from broncitisand i just farted and u get a tickit because u answered the door naked

Nero was my name thousands of years ago, but I believe that those With clearer sight, brighter minds, those you remaining WITHOUT the sense of Complete doom, oh children of the night, know far better, turn to my side, and sheep you shall be no more, together we shall be Whole once again, the sheperd of this New world! Thumb this up if you have seen the signs... Thumb this up if you have seen the sins... ...End up buried under the corpses of everything you knew if you have no vision in this New dawn of ages endlessly darknening, and pretend that the internet will be there, or that the horsehead network ever mattered to you for that matter... :You say insanity today, sunday 27th January 2016, you will be the one running, begging that Our world is but YOUR INSANITY, a nightmare, which only Death will awaken you from

knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

Your mother is so ugly corrective surgery would not be able to improve her appearance

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

What did the trucker say when his hat blew out the window? "**** my hat!" What did the teenager say when the same thing happened to him in his small car? The same thing, except he was a teenager, driving a small car.

A woman crashes her car into a pole Thier family is suing for a hit and run

If at first you don't succeed, there's a very substantial probability that you failed.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

You: Why did hitler go to hell? Them: Why? You: You're an idiot.

whats yellow and blue and green all over? the color green

Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

breasts

How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

There was an English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man. The Welsh man couldn't make it. Again.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

What's the difference between 15 dead babies and a cadilac? I don't have a cadilac.

Why did the maid clean the house? Because that's her job, ya moron.

why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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