Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

Theres this black guy who goes to a gun shop and buys a .45 and then goes to get a permit and uses it responsibly....

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

punchline below punchline above

Who gave Miley Cyrus her new haircut? Hellen Keller

How do you piss off a gypsy? Curse at him

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

what did the cripple, the cancer guy, the blonde, and the blackguy have in common they all have no reason to live

your momma is so fat that she should be worried about her higher risk of heart disease, diabetes, and ugliness.

Daisies are green, poppies are white, I have a headache.

What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

Why does the Batman theme song have 'na na na na na na na na' in it so many times? I guess Batman really likes sodium. Or maybe his record player's broken.

Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

Why did the sky turn gray? Yes because she thought it meant a quarterback.

how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

How do you make a baby cry? You throw bricks at its face.

Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was standing next to you.

Why was the guy stupid? 'Cause he was!

Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

Whats black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...