why did the roof cave in? It was not structurally sound do to poor architecture

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Why did the baby fall out of the trees? Cause it was dead.

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Did you hear about my new Muslim friend? Hes the bomb!

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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Why didn't the magician pull a rabbit from a hat? Despite his choice of occupation, magic tricks are rarely appropriate in hostage situations.

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A girl walks into a bar and the bartender says, "why is your face so tan?" And she replies "I just got back from the beach."

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Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

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If at first you don’t succeed, you clearly weren’t the right person for the job. We’re sorry, but we’re going to have to let you go; please collect your belongings and vacate the premises immediately.

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Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

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Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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What do I do with all the wheelchairs after I boil all the vegetables?

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

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What's the best type of silence in a family? None, all families should be open in communication.

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chuck norris does not know how to use a plunger.

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What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why didnt little Timmy come home? He was abducted into slavery.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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