Stephen Hawking can walk

A baby walks into a bar, not long before it leaves out of the bar.

Q. What do you call a white guy with a black dick? A. Gay

Nope, I mean you can try, but my phone is busted and the code on the chip my galpal here managed to finally get into the cell, has sixteen digits so damn small that none of us can read it,

What's worse than holocaust jokes? The Rwandam Genocide.

A: Knock, knock A: Knock, knock A: Um, knock, knock! B: Sorry, I was pretending that I wasn't home.

what is the biggest lie in the whole world? -please drink responsibly

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

My favorite color is Ham. And I can count to Potato.

Why did the fat Jew cross the road? To go to the bicycle shop to fix his puncture

010010101210001010 You dirty girl

why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

A duck walks into the bar, buys a beer, steals your woman, wins a bar fight, pistol whips a police officer, departs and shouts Aflac

melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

What did spongebob say to patrick? Im ready! im ready!

Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

Lard and Liz lard,lard and Liz

Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

A man and a women are having sex. He farted so she left before he came.

What is cowboy say

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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