Why was the Black man running with a T.V.? Because he had just purchased a new LCD FlatScreen from BestBuy, and a torrential downpour had just began and he didn't have a free hand to hold up his umbrella.

Why is the moon gray? Why is it not?

womens rights

Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

TOP COMMENT IS MINE!

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M's factory? For throwing away all the W's

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

whats funny about anti jokes? nothing hince the name ANTI.

Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

What do you call Morgan Freeman at a family reunion? Morgan Freeman.

knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

a brick cheated on another brick, the brick that was cheated on was angry and became disgusted at the brick that cheated. the current brick that was cheated on tryied top kill the other bitch brick, the brick that cheated tried to break up the fight but testicles

If Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and Charlie Sheen were in a room together and you had a gun with two bullets, who would you shoot? Well Hitler and Bin Laden are already dead, and Charlie probably wouldn't die. Plus, I honestly don't think I could bring myself to shoot someone.

Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

Q: Why didn't the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

A man walks into a bar, ouch!

So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Crossing Guard union had reached a collective agreement and they had returned to work and it was safe to cross once again.

Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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