Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Knock knock. Why do you say the words "knock knock" without actually knocking on the door?

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The movie starts off with Tom Cruz jumping out of a plane. He hits the ground and dies, end of movie. - Cole G.

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"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

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What has four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill someone? A pool table.

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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What do you call a man who tripped on a rock? A man who tripped on a rock.

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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what did one dog say to his sex partner? woof woof

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if my evil next door neighbor is building a rocket to steal the moon with the help of 3 little girls, a grumpy old man and about 5000 small yellow poeple; what do i do? get sued for coping a copyrighted movie plot

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

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When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he accidently dropped it.

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I was gonna make a joke about a my dick... Racecar

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

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Two hunters walk in to the forest. They have a great time ending the lives of defenceless creatures. They go to their respective homes, eat a light dinner, and fall asleep in their beds.

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Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

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What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

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why do black people like kool-aid? it's a tasty refreshment

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A boy got a dog for his Birthday. The dog would have said happy Birthday but dogs can't speak.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

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You got yourself a mole, I suggest you restrict all access to any and everyone that could possibly go under aliases such as: The Wiz. Azure. Dungeon Lord. Dice. Wizard, and anything similar, he is most likely a computer geek which does not necessarily look like one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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