Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

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Q: If you see a gipsy drowning, what will you throw him?! A: His family.

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Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

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How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

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what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

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Laugh.

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Why did the clock say 10:30? It was a digital clock!

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Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that's just been shot.

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A man walks into an oven. He suffers severe burns and dies on a hospital bed

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Why was the asain studing? Because he had a 59 in math and needed a C to tay on the footbal team.

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Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

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Why didn't the black man finish his lunch? He wasn't hungry

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

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What did the girl say to the guy who poked her on Facebook? You poked me.

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What did the snake say to the rat?

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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A man walks into a bar and gets drink

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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