What's big and long? My dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: What did little Timmy get from his mother this Christmas? A: The contents of her will.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Tim likes girls

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: How do Hellen Keller's parents punish her? A: They give her a timeout

thumb_up thumb_down -21

knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats the differents between a red farrari and a dead baby? I dont have a red farrari in my garage;)

thumb_up thumb_down -21

So this guy walks into a bar, & says "I'll have a beer"........ Yup

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Where would a 65 year old man find a young, attractive woman who would take any interest in him? Very likely in a hospital, but that would be a professional interest, not a sexual one.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats the difference between garlic bread and a Jewish person? Garlic bread doesn't scream in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

sorry son your nanas been put down

thumb_up thumb_down -21

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR S H I T STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man walks into a bar. Suddenly, he is filled with a strange feeling, as if his life is somehow the subject of a stupid joke. He walks back out of the bar and consults a psychiatrist.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What headphones does the farmer use? He is going through a financial struggle at the moment and cannot afford such a luxury.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is worst than 1 baby dead in a microwave? 2 babies dead in the same microwave !

thumb_up thumb_down -21

have you seen hellen kellers new treehouse? no well neither has she

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between a raccoon and a bear? One's a raccoon, the other's a bear.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why doesn't God like fruitcake? Because God doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? a surgeon.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is big, eats cats, smells good, but looks like shit? A big, cat eating, good smelling piece of shit

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops