why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens just walk places. they have no agenda.

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my wife out of the kitchen

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Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

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What do you do to a little boy who just called you fat? Throw a rhino at him!

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Why was it sad for black guys drove off a cliff? There two more seats

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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knock knock!? . . No.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who Doctor Octagonapus! BLAAAUUUUGGGHHHH

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

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Strength of body Vs Strengh of Mind. Mind: You can lead a horse to water... Strength: Then you can force that mother*bleep* to drink all you want that *bleep* to drink! Strength of body wins, horseless victory.

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What's worse than a papercut? Dying

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So, this joke isn't funny.

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Knock knock. This is a no soliciting residence, and I do not open my door for strangers.

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A man walks into a bar gets hurt and falls over

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, water and sand are incapable of speech. Unless of course you are Harry Potter in which case you can cast a spell on them and turn them into a cat which still couldn't talk and them from there you could wait for them to evolve which doesn't actually exist so you would have to ask God and then you would wait for a few years than they could say hi.

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How do you get a woman out of a car? You drive it into a river and her body will float to the top.

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What do you call a man that paints on a his face and wears big shoes? Lady Gaga.

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Your mom showed up at my house last night. I kindly greeted her and asked if I could help her with anything.

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Knock Knock : F*ck im watching porn...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops