Who took the cookie from the cookie jar? Your mom

How many nipples are on a raccoon ? I don't raccoono

Why is there an owl out during the day? I don't know.

How do you confuse a girl? Easily.

Why did I miss my bus? Because my watch was wrong.

meh

Roses are red Violets are too I am color blind How about you

What is the good thing about having sex with KL..... Nothing because she is a fat man

A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

Why did the chicken cross the road? after approximately 10 seconds of looking back and forth left to right the chicken finally came to a realization that the road is clear and safe to cross.

Boy:well you merry me. Girl:no Boy: why not? Girl:becuase you're rapeing me

whats worse than speaking with your mouth full? pooing with your mouth full

roses are red violets are blue they are pretty and you are not

what do abortion and a coat hanger have in common? they both contain 4 vowels

What makes us laugh? Definitely not this joke!

Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

Why did the Olympic gold-medalist lose his faith in God? Because he began to feel that the the reasoning that most religions were based on was fairly spurious.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the food supply was scarce

Do you know the muffin man? No

I am a women

Why wad six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sexual offender.

What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

What happened when the boy fell off of the bridge? He died

Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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