"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

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A duck walks into a bar. A horse walks into a bar. A cow walks into a bar. A bear walks into a bar. The owner tells them to get out, but they can't understand humans. So they just stayed there.

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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They see me trollin' They hatin'...

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A muslin walks into a bar, and has the same equal rights as everyone else and orders a pint of fosters.

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Worms don't like apples.

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Roses are Tits Violets are Tits I love Tits TITS!

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why did dinosaurs get extinct? i don't know i was not there to see it!!!!!!!!!

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What is brown and sticky? A chocolate ice cream made with too much margarine and not enough of the ice mixture used to make Mr Whippy

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A man and a women are having sex. He farted so she left before he came.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

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How long does it take a blonde to skrew in a light bulb? Any amount of time; given that she knows that said bulb is in need of replace meant, or that said blonde is disabled, or if you thought I would make some kind of funny blonde joke that you would tell your friend and then forget ten minutes later, only to think of it a day later and claim it as your own.

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A priest, a pastor, and a rabbi walk into a bar. All three are alcoholics and have done irreparable damage to their livers.

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whats worse than a baby impaled on your lawn... the universe being consumed by a giant albino ape with over sized testicles

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Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

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Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

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a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

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Roses are Red ?And sometimes yellow ? My mother is mellow ? Billy you have cancer ?

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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what's better than winning the special olympics?.. Not being retarded

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How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

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once upon a time a guy thought he wrote an original anti joke but it wasnt

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Whats the easiest way to get a dumb blond to have sex with you? rape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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