Why was the boy crying on his birthday? He was being molested by his birthday clown who he was fully aware was his alcoholic costumed father.... And it wasn't his birthday.

Why couldn't the fan turn on? Because it was broken.

Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

Why does Michael J Fox have such good handwriting? Through years of hardwork, perseverance, and rehabilitation.

Knock knock Who's there? Justin Bieber OH MY GOD REALLY?! No.

69

why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

what did the jew get for christmas? nothing Jewish people don't celebrate christmas

melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

Why are cats mammals? Because they are descended from primordial mammals in the distant past which are the common ancestors of all mammals.

why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT i farted. : l

what did the iPhone say to the other iPhone. we should not worry about that because iPhones are mute

Q: What has 2 eyes and 2 halves of pigs' snout? A: Two pigs peeking around a corner.

A Chinese man a Mexican and an American are all on a plane. They are all trying to get rid of stuff they have to much of in their country. The chinese man throws out a bowl of rice and says " we have to many of these in our country" the mexican throws out a taco and says " we have to many of these in our country" the American throws out the mexican and says "we have to many of these in our country"

A duck walks into a bar. A horse walks into a bar. A cow walks into a bar. A bear walks into a bar. The owner tells them to get out, but they can't understand humans. So they just stayed there.

"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains! That's the least of your worries you have aids!

I also wanted to write a joke but I forgot it so here I am. Minecraft rocks and everyone who says otherwise is a noob

the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

They see me trollin' They hatin'...

a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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