Why did John McCain lose the election? He did not get as many votes as Barack Obama.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

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Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

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Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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whats the difference between a European and a african an african has more pigment in his skin due to prolonged exposure to light

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A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

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So a Jewish Family wakes into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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What do you call a dog riding a bicycle? An talented dog.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

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Knock, Knock! Who`s there? Your mama`s stupid! Your mama`s stupid who? Your mama`s stupid as a rock! I` m going to cut your eyes out and use them as baseballs!

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Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

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Q-how many dead babies does it take to paint your geradge door? A-one if you throw it hard enough

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why dont you ever run over a black guy thats on a bike? because you will be sewed and also probably have the shit kicked out of you

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit does shit stick to your fur? The rabbit says no, so the bear wipes his ass on the rabbit

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When geese fly south, why is one side of the V usually longer than the other? There are more geese on that side.

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Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

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What is an emulation? I am not as stupid as I seem by the way, I am just a bit shaky myself, but don't you worry i will answer whatever you need,

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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Mom: what does IDK, LY, and TTYL mean? Son: I don't know, love you, and talk to you later. Mom: OK, I'll ask your sister.

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Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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