Brandon Bass's career average for assists is 0.7 a game. guess what his nickname is bassy

why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

Q. What did the toothbrush say to the toothpaste A. Nothing you idiot there inanimate objects they can't talk

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

What is the difference between Barack Obama and Simba from the Lion King? One is a cartoon character from a beloved Disney classic and the other is the current President of the United States of America.

why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

A man in a wheelchair walked into a bar. No he didn't.

If woman that have big breasts work at Hooters, then do woman with one leg work at Ihop?

What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into your grandmother and finding a fish

Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

How do you get 100 midgets into a mini? You have to manufacture a mini big enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It won't be street legal, but at least your problem with fitting the midgets in the mini is solved.

How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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