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A grasshopper walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you", the grasshopper replies, "you have a drink named Bob"

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Why did the couple stop at the stop sign? Because it's the law.

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How did the hot blonde get a promotion from her boss? She worked really hard and achieved more thaan her coworkers.

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what would you watch during a scary movie? anything you want.

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One day a married couple have a conversation. The husband says, "Make me a sandwich." The wife says, "Okay, what do you want on it?"

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Hey I just met you I'm on bathsalts your face looks tasty

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color blind person solves a rubix cube just kidding thier color blind

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A man came home from work and said to his wife im going to kill u

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Sex! Sex Who? Sex with me. BOOM!

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Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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Why was the deer afraid of the hunter because the smell of toasters

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Do you wanna build a snowman ? No.

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How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

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Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!!"

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A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

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What did the paper towel say to the tomato? Nothing.

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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