What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -7

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Jesus

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you get when you cross an l with a line? A t.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Hello, nice to meet you.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Runescape.

thumb_up thumb_down -83

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My room is a mess, Violets are still blue

thumb_up thumb_down +42

why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

roses are red, violets are blue when ever l flush the toilet i think of you

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops