A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

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why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

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What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

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Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

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Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

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Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

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Two guys walk in to a bar the third one ducks.

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A black man bought a large condom because he has a big penis.

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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