The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

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A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

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lebron

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Chuck Norris can watch TV.

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

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Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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Women's Rights

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What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

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Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

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Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

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How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? You said you'd never forget.

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What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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You.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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