roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

What would be funny? Seeing justin beiber 's penis.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sexual offender.

Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

pedophile

What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

How did the cat die? I just it nine times

what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

Hi

On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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