How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

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Where do bananas come from? Mexico

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your momma's so stupid she shot herself

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Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?. I dont know either it was dark.

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A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

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Why didn't Helen Keller have headphones? Because they weren't invented

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What do you call a dinosaur when it gets out of a pool? Wet.

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Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

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What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

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make me a sandwich!

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whats annoying and black? black people

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

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if a white guy, a black guy and a hispanic guy jump off a 10 story building, who hits the ground first? the man who jumped first. racist.

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Women's rights.

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America Votes

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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The meme walks out of the bar.

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What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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