If an aeroplane falls from 15,000 feet in the air and crashes into and orphanage is it possible that no-one will get hurt? No,the aeroplane will destroy the orphange hurting the property value.

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- I was at my house last night - I was at your MOM'S house last night... I'm her neighbor, she was having trouble with her plumbing and I thought i should help out

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because I seem to notice fractures to your knee, spine and a possible permanent risk of poor posture.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a double whiskey. The bar man says "what's with the long face"? The horse replies "My wife left me, took the kids with her, took everything, I'm devastated"

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I take my cleats off when I jump on trampolines

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What did Robert Kardashian say at O.J.'s most recent trial? Nothing. He died of esophagal cancer

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You know what's natural? Bears.

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

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Why did the Italian family have spaghetti for dinner? Thats the only thing they had in the house

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Why couldn't the convicted felonist get back to America? He was in Antarctica and accidentally licked a flagpole.

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A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

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Seeing you happy is what makes me happy Nero, it has always been this way.

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what do you call white people running down a mountain? Avalanche What do you call black people running down a mountain? Jailbreak

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What do tomatoes, apples, oranges, lemons, and peaches have in common? They are all fruits.

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a dead baby joke? Dead baby jokes aren't funny.

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock.. Who's there? Not Sally!

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how do you get an A in a class? idk never got on.

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why do ducks have webbed feet? to stomp out fires. why do elephants have flat feet? to stomp out the burining ducks.

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny?

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your mom's so fat that even the biggest case of cancer couldn't brake through her flubber its so big

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops