What did the man say while he was in surgery? Nothing, he was in surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do u call something black and hanging from a tree.............................. a black guy

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red, violets are blue, whoever met you is a BIG fool

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the baby bird have no friends? Because he chose not to socialize with the baby birds.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo momma's so fat, she's broke 'cause she spent too much money on food.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? get down.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red Violets are blue Lemons are yellow

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call two black men screaming as loud as they can? Scared

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A narwhall walks into a store and asks the cashier where he keeps the soap products. The cashier does not speak english.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the Indian at the casino? He had a gambling addiction.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a camel with three humps? A deformed bactrian

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the man in the kitchen? Because his wife was raped and killed.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what cuts the grass on christmas eve and lives in mexico? JP I lied about Mexico jackin it in san diego

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What a wonderfuuuul wooorld: Would this not be a wonderful world if we instead of killing innocent children, just gRaped them hard and painfully in every damn hole and let them go home? Ad: Consider the life of the poor children, Just 0rape them hard!... For love! Awww... Moral: What moral You see any moral here? XD No Not Nerometal, I am that "leader of the Neronist... whatever" Yes, that is who I am. Real moral: "Seriously who is gonna listen to some kid who is just (severely) butthurt anyway huh? Cut their tongues off! Just do not kill them... For a wonderful world..." <3 (Not a heart lol)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great height she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what would Jesus do? Get crucified and die.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

tomorrows international kill and orphan day, how meany of the sad bastard's you plan on baking into dough?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

numbers just make the funniest antijokes

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So there's this one Cheerio who really likes this frosted Cheerio. He walks up to her one day and asks her out. She responded, "no I only date frosted Cheerios." The Cheerio then went and got a tutor, he became very, very smart and turned into a multi-grain Cheerio. He goes up to the frosted Cheerio and asks her out. "no, you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he gets a gym membership and works really, really hard and becomes and apple cinnamon Cheerio. He asks her out again, "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." so he goes to church too and becomes a honey nut Cheerio. "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he focuses and tries even harder than ever before and finally becomes a frosted Cheerio. He asks her out, "will you be my girlfriend? I heard about this party this weekend we can go to." she answers, "I'll be your girlfriend, let's go to that party." So, they go to this party. The boy asks. "do you want anything to drink?" the girl says "sure maybe some wine." the boy en goes to the wine store. There's a super long line and he waits and waits but goes back to the party. He tells her and asks her if she wants anything else. "some soda maybe." he goes to the soda shop and there's another long line and he waits until he can't take it and goes back again. He tells h and asks her if she wants anything else. "some punch please." He goes to the punch store, and there's no punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops