Why was the priest circumcised? He had a very painful urinary tract infection

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

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Penis

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Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Once, a woman told her son to be a peach and fetch some sugar. Little did she know that a genie heard her. The next day, she was horrified to find her son gone and a peach in his bed.

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What's green and looks like a red truck? A green truck.

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A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

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Ask me If I am an orange? Are you and Orange? No

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

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What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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A guy walks into a bar. I didn't see anything else.

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Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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What did the boy say when he could'nt find his dog? I wonder where Spot went.

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Why did Steve Jobs step down as CEO of Apple? Because he died.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

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Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

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Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese

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A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

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what is green and has wheels grass i lied about the wheels

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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