One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

Arrow to the Knee

What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

123457

What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

hrih

A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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