Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

What do you call a dinosaur when it gets out of a pool? Wet.

Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

How's your mum? she's dead..

Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

What did the dog say to the cat? I have no idea. I wasn't there.

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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