Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

What did the thief get for Christmas? Nothing. He was sentenced to the death penalty.

What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

I went to the store and I fell

What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

give my joke a thumbs up Please!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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