If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

knock knock whos there? your mother your mother who? ...........what?

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

Obama 2012

Q. What's funnier than an anti-joke? A. Thousands of anti-jokes, compiled on a worldwide network.

Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

You.

What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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