a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

What do you call 10,000 lawyers jumping off a cliff? Mass suicide

Why did the black man buy ten packets of Kool-Aid at the supermarket? Because it is a refreshing beverage that many individuals enjoy drinking.

If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

Why didnt Stevie Wonder wave back at the white man? Because he's a racist.

why do women rip you off? Because they like money

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

Anne Widdecombe becomes attractive.

Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

Stealth baseballs record

why did the boy fly away because his mum shot him out of a cannon

Why was the black family eating KFC? Because KFC tastes very nice and there was a discount on the family bucket.

Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

You know what I'm thinking of right now? Eyebrows

i am not a pothead!!! the only time ive evr been high was springbreak last year!!! mm hmm... wat were u doin over spring break to get high? i had jaw surgery and the doctor had me on tons of painkillers

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, Oh shit, my garden is on fire

whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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