What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get down.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

Q. Why did the man die? A. Natural Causes

Friends are like potatoes - when you eat them they die.

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

What's Kanye West's goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

What do you call a black man who is great at basketball? An all-star

Roses are red Violets are blue Just smoked some Meth nelnfjknfkjnwkejnkjnwefkjnKJNFKJRNFKWNEFEJNFJNWKEJNWFKEJFN

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he needed to go home.

What's worse than failing an exam? Failing two exams.

What's the difference between Christians and Jews? The Holocaust. The Holocaust is the difference.

Jimmy is taking a walk to Dairy Queen he walks into an allyway where he is shot with a 44 magnum and later dies in hospital his family morns

Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

What's worst then finding a worm in your apple Eating it.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand. QUACK!!!

Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

Why was billy made fun of his whole life? Because he's mentally retarded

What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

Roses are red Violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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