How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

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Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

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What did the Rabbi say to the priest? The holocaust was real and it tore apart my family.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? No. Trees don't jump

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why did the packers win the superbowl? because they were very good

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What's the difference between an egg and a Llama? The'yre both not lamps.

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whats long, hard and full of seamen submarine

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into a worm and finding an apple in it.

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What's the difference between an American and a Russian? One's American and one's Russian.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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why was the little boy sad? he found out that George Washington was dead.

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Moral

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Q: why can't women drive? A: because there is no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

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"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

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roses are red violets are blue i'm not a? poet microwave

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

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An irish man walks out of a bar

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

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Your mom is so old she is significantly more identifiable in a crowd of middle-aged men and women.

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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