A beautoful poem: Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun! gimme all your money!

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Whats worse than a son killing his own father? His biological father finds him, 10 years later.

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knock, knock who's there? boo boo who? sorry i dont know anyone named boohoo so get the hell off my lawn

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look this kid up on facebook and spam him!! its funny, Josh Noonan, also his cell number is 603 560 3399....

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? I cry when I chop up an onion.

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What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

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Why did the girl fall off the swing ? Because she lost her balance and the force of gravity put upon her was too great for her to bear, resulting in her fall.

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Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

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Did you know that a hamster and a cigarette are almost the same? How? Because they are both completely harmless until you put them in your mouth and light them on fire.

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Q: Why do black people like fried chicken? A: Because it tastes delicious!

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What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

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Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

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Q: Why did Grandma fall down the stairs? A: Because she had a brain hammerage

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I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because of excess velocity.

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Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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roses are red orchids are black I like you best when you lye on your back

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-Why did the man sue the train driver after he witnessed his friends death? -Because he was owed a duty of care.

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Why did the leaf fall off the tree? Because it was Fall.

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why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops