How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

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how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

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Q: Whats Faster than a bullet A: A Jew chasing coin

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

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2+2= 478

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

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What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

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Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

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Q: What did the boy do when his mom asked him to put away his clothes? A: Yes. PS: If that wasn't funny to you, then go f**k off. You clearly don't have any sence of humor and you should see someone about that, like a mental health doctor.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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wat does T.J.C.S. Mean? leave an comment to answer

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There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

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How did the cat die? I just it nine times

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(in a retarted voice) i want to go to disneyland

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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