Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

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knock knock whos there? your mother your mother who? ...........what?

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

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A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

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Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops