How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

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Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

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Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

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What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

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What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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What do you call a guy with newmonya? Not good at spelling

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Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

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Why dont you ever see any black mermaids? Mermaids dont exist.

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Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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There is a running race, both black and white people are running in this race! Half way through there is an avalanche and every black person running was killed! Who won the race??? Society... :D

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How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

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A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops